End of February

 

Great News!

Most recent check-in at Fred Hutch yielded a PSA of 0.11, which means the treatment is working. We are over the moon!!!!The past few months have been mostly unseasonably cold days, lots of layers when we go outside. It’s back to our normal weather patterns as of last week. The days are getting longer, I’ve been outside on my bike and the 300 or so bulbs we planted last fall are popping through for a peek. And we moved the rack, trays, pots and lights to the dining room, preparing to start our veggies from seed. It’s the beginning of our busy time which builds gradually until May, when we scramble to finish getting everything in the ground, then the pace slows to a steady rhythm until the veggies and berries start showing up in mid-July and we start eating and processing. Long days outside with lots of activity, and the company of "The Boys', aka, our dogs. Who could ask for more?

Veg Club resumed in February, our online gardening classes that we started when I worked at the library. The library has since discontinued the partnership. We found a local preparedness organization that is awesome. We are grateful to them for their support, values and community connectedness. And I love working with our Veg Club host. She’s knowledgeable, experienced and positive. You can find our YouTube channel, Kitsap Veg Club.

I’ve been writing quite a bit, both in my journal and composing poems. I wake quite early most mornings as I’ve not slept well since September and have a constant headache to boot. Nothing unmanageable, mostly just the side-effects from the meds I’m taking. I like to use the time to read, write and hang with Freddy, one of our dogs. I think he worries about me so he gets up and joins me on the couch in the mornings. Which brings an issue: if spell check, arguably a simple form of AI, is so horribly inefficient, e.g., not able to recognize ‘morning’ if letters are transposed or one is missing, is it a good idea to slowly cede the control of the world to artificial intelligence? I digress.

I’ve been enjoying quite a few great reads;

Goodbye to Clocks Ticking by Joseph Monninger, a memoir from a man whose terminal cancer diagnosis came 4 days after retirement. It’s a spare, simple and lyrical account of someone who has come to terms with his situation, sensed his priorities and is making the best of what he has left. It is hard to put down.

The Seven Moons of Maali Almeida by Shehan Karunatilaka, the tale of a war photographer of the 1990s civil war in Sri Lanka. It’s told from the perspective of his dismembered body looking for closure. Absolutely brilliant!

And a lot of poetry, The works of Ross Gay (Book of Delights, Catalog of unabashed Gratitude), Michele Bombardier (What We Do), and a few collections with poems of hope and gratitude from Story Publishing.

 

Lots of hockey to enjoy on TV. I’ve seen a couple of Kraken games with my good friend Larry. We both grew up in Maine, but didn’t meet until he moved to the island a while back. We know a lot of the same people, have similar childhood experiences and it seems like we’ve known each other forever. He’s a generous soul and I love hanging out with him.

Went to Smash Putt (Google it), I can say that it’s an unusual approach to mini-golf that has to be experienced. We went with our dear friends K&K, followed by one of the best Thai meals I’ve ever had!!! I love spending time with them, they’re positive, bright, warm, connected people who always have interesting and fun things to do. And they’re the closest we have to family (while not actually be related by blood or law) in the Pac NW.

 

Both dogs have been to the vet recently, not something they enjoy. Vinnie has some stuff going on and Fred is getting his teeth cleaned. Those furry little turd droppers bring us unlimited joy with their love and antics, plus taking them for walks gets us outside. We are so grateful that they live here.

 

And I have a couple of poems to share. One a Valentine for Berit, the most amazing human I know, and one for my father. You can figure out which is which.

More to follow…

 

Coda

If I should fall from thee,

Do not weep, for I have led

An interesting & fruitful life.

Celebrate my fortune

To have lived so well

Surrounded by caring people.

 

If I should fall from thee,

Know that I had purpose & value,

With friends I depended on

And those who depended on me,

That I cherished time with family

And was lifted by their love.

 

If I should fall from thee,

Be happy that I experienced

The warm closeness

Of a kind & gentle soul

Who blessed me with her trust,

Asking only for what I could give.

 

If I should fall from thee,

Embrace the opportunity of each day.

Know the tranquility of acceptance,

Revel in the gift of gratitude

And the release of forgiveness,

As I am not sure that I ever did.

 

If I should fall from thee,

Take pleasure in the hesitance of snowflakes,

The damp whispers of a foggy morning,

And a flash of green as the sun bids adieu,

For I am amidst stardust

With those who have gone before.

Marginal Effort Publishing

 

 

 

Hazel Smile

I wake to your hazel smile

And am released

From the worry and weariness.

A conversation, a caress, a cuddle, a kiss

Brings a closeness that,

Before you, did not exist.

In you I feel the beauty of the world,

The calm, the openness, the kindness,

And I want it for myself.

You are grace personified

And I am grateful

Beyond expression.

Love,

J

Marginal Effort Publishing

 

February '25

 

Cold and clear at 0545 today, 29 degrees. The boys barked at the door and ventured into the backyard without hesitation. I balked and made coffee in the warm kitchen.

I’ve been reading and writing in the mornings, when no one is stirring. It’s quiet. I like to be up to greet the sun when it arrives. Fred joins me. I think he worries about me. He’s a great friend. We were lucky to find him among the discarded dogs the lesser of humanity cast aside.

I’ve been reading ‘Goodbye to Clocks Ticking’ by Joseph Monninger. It’s beautiful. He has a spare style, honest and clear. I discovered him in this month’s Downeast Magazine. It’s not an easy read, but for those of you who dare to venture in, you’ll be rewarded with the story of someone whose path turns unexpectedly, forcing a hard look at life and a restructuring of priorities.

I bought a few poetry books at Eagle Harbor Book Co. on Monday, ‘A Happy Poem to Start Every Day’, ‘I Sing the Salmon Home’, and ‘The Path to Kindness’ which is by the same publisher who did ‘How to Love the World’. I haven’t been sleeping well. I get up frequently to pee and I have a lot of wild dreams, intense and vivid, not restful. It could be the meds. I was hoping some positive poetry would help.

Last night I dreamed of hanging out with puppies at an animal rescue in a Cascade Mountains, whistlestop, logging town. My partner and s-in-l Lisa were with me. Maybe the poetry is helping, but then again, I got so involved with my day yesterday that I forgot to take my after-breakfast meds. I’ve only missed a dose one time, not bad for an old geezer.

Still training for the Chilly Hilly at the end of the month. It’s 33 miles of island hills in the cold, hence the name of the ride. Like the Chicago song, 'I’m feeling stronger every day', so hope to make the ride and finish.

Check-up, bloodwork and a Lupron injection next week, the first since I finished radiation. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t nervous about it. The Hutch has the best of everything, so that dampens the anxiety a bit. And my partner will be with me. Her calming confidence and we-got-this attitude helps me stay on track and moving forward and most importantly, stay grounded. It’s hard to describe what her support means to me. It transcends words and always fills me with tears of gratitude when I try. Not sure why I continue to play the lotto as I won it when I met her!

I’m volunteering once again with the island’s preparedness group, a generous and kind collective of dedicated folks. And I’m still helping with gardening classes online with my friend Carol. Here’s a link to our latest class https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h_FRUpNOzDI

And my wonderfully talented b-in-l (and amazing human) Sam Bergquist recently composed and uploaded a great tune on YouTube, ‘Lucky’

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2rPtK97x6U It's a heartfelt tribute to his dad and my father-in-law, another amazing human. Please be sure to like and comment as it supports Sam in his efforts and will keep him composing and uploading more great tunes.

More to follow…

 

 

The Boys

One rests off watch by the woodstove,  

So close you need oven mitts to pick him up.

The other stands sentinel.

His tower atop the back of the couch,

Waiting, watching & listening.

Don’t mistake the focus & intent,

For calm and patience, he will pounce.

They are rescues 4 & 5 aka, The Boys.

Curious & cautious, suspicious of squirrels,

And loud black birds, and worm-steeling birds, and flittering birds,

Actually, any birds,

And gravity-defying cyclists,

And little ones being pushed in strollers, or carried in packs

And fast cars, and cars with roof-top carriers,

And big trucks, and loud trucks, and trucks with trailers,

Actually, any trucks,

And the brown and the blue vans,

What are they thinking,

Leaving their junk on the porch.

Sound the alarm at the slightest provocation,

Better safe than sorry.

The world can be scary when you’re the size of a loaf of bread.

The Boys are in charge of security,

Because humans just don’t know.

Greeting the day with yawns & stretches,

Soft bellies beckon a rub.

Nearly hiding behind a kitchen chair to avoid a rainy-day walk.

Couch napping, sun seeking, toy chewing, floor wresting,

Ball chasing, turd dropping, snack snatching cuties,

One jumps, twirls, whines & growls,

While the other waits & watches from his ‘place’

As slow humans fix doggie dinner.

They love dog loaf, kibble, flax seed, and pumpkin,

Shredded carrot or sliced cabbage or chopped broccoli, always.

Maybe sardines or leftover salmon or halibut, yum.

And treats, lots of treats.

Spa Day is not so bad.

The warm wet, the smelly suds,

The cuddle in a towel, and the hot, blowing air

From that loud thing, noisy and scary,

But oh, that hot, blowing air…

Humans are nice, especially the smaller one,

Who smells good and speaks softly.

Like pre-pubescent boys, rescues 4 & 5 are living contradictions,

Tough shells, filled with fragile tenderness and love.

8 Feb 25  John Fossett  Marginal Effort Publishing Co.

 

Chester

My father departed in the wee, small hours today. He walked the earth for 94 years and 8 months and 'glided to a stop', as my brother so aptly put it. My brother and my sister were with him. 

My father passed the way most of us would like to, peacefully, family near, surrounded with love.

He was a complex guy not always easy to be with, still, my heart breaks when I think of him. Upon reflection, he'd probably say the same of me.

It's been a quiet morning. 

I've been listening to a playlist of music he liked and polishing up some poetry, I've included one below.

I'm going to walk the dogs now.

Heavy Weather Sailing

The storm endured for 94 years.

She deftly navigated the wind and waves,

Surviving in the eye for nearly nine decades.

Sailing to exotic ports of call,

Away from the boom & bluster.

Fixing her position by

Sparkling stars and summer sun,

All while providing a lee for her crew.

But the rarely relenting vigor

Of the gale wore her down.

Her compass, charts, and sextant,

Swept away by seas,

Her sails in tatters, helm untended,

Flotsam/jetsam in her wake,

She drifted, alone on the briny deep.

But not before showing her crew

The easy way and balmy breezes

Of the tropics.

 

The storm endured for 94 years.

She trained her crew well,

Preparing them for their own voyages.

They jumped ship, one at a time,

Departing for ports of their own,

Finding their own gentle navigators.

Some dropped anchor a few hundred miles from the eye,

Sharing hard-won knowledge with others.

One sought refuge on the far side of the world,

On white sands with sweet citrus and tree ferns.

Another found the sheltered shores

Of the Salish Sea, away from the fury,

With a navigator, positive & patient,

Kind & caring, brimming with love,

Showing that not every voyage

Charts a course through heavy weather.

 

The storm endured for 94 years.

Like the great red spot on Jupiter,

He scoured the planet,

Devouring conflict

Like a Michelin starred meal,

Because being right

Brought more than being happy.

His days were councils & committees,

Rarely resting, constant motion,

As another task awaited.

Occasionally, the mistral abated,

Never the Horse Latitudes,

As mackerel skies and mare’s tails

Always loomed on the horizon,

But the wind let go, with the sun

Filling cracks in the clouds,

Like caulking between planks.

He joked with friends, sang in the choir,

Shared his wisdom, helped as needed,

Sailed, fished, hunted

And played cribbage.

And He cried as each of the crew departed.

It was his brand of love, but love, nonetheless.

The squalls and squabbles have dissipated,

No longer filling sails,

While the abiding chaos of navigating shoal water

And confused seas have taken their toll,

His work is done.

He is underway to Snug Harbor.

May he rest his oars at last,

And know the solace

Of fair winds and following seas,

And that his crew loved him,

His brand of love, but love, nonetheless.

26 Jan 25 John F Fossett  Marginal Effort Publishing

Lots since the last...

 

September was nice. My brother was here until mid-month, always a pleasure.

We biked to the Nat’l Nordic Museum in Ballard, via the bike trail and Locks, Goldilocks biking weather, although it started to rain as we got off the ferry and got drenched on the final leg home.

We spent some time with family in OlyWA. Danced at the yoga center. Much, much garden work, harvesting, prepping freezing canning & drying food. Put up 13 gallons of berries in addition to what we ate.

The bloodwork orders for the end of the month were mix-up, so we rescheduled. With the bloodwork finally sorted, I had a draw. Got hearing aids (Bluetooth for audiobooks, OMG!) and they placed gold markers in my prostate (to avoid confusion, different medical professionals for each), and that was just Tues-Fri of Week One.

Week Two: Had my eyes checked, got acupuncture, received approval for acupuncture as part of Integrative Health at Fred Hutch, and celebrated the end of the week with a CT scan and MRI at UW Medicine in Montlake.

Week Three: Acupuncture

Week Four: Acupuncture, get my leg form made, tattoo markers drawn and an MRI before we start radiation sessions. Daily radiation sessions (sans weekends and holidays) begin Oct 25^th, and it’s not as simple as I thought, need at least 150 mL of liquid in bladder. I figure it out, but it gets harder with more radiation sessions. Went to the Silvertips hockey game in EvWA.

Week Five: Five days of radiation at The Hutch, to clarify, that’s Fred Hutch and not the gift store is my hometown.

October proved useful for finishing up some outside projects. We managed to tune up quite a few things in the yard before the cold, wet & dark of winter descends upon us.

November was filled with radiation every single day, except weekends and holidays. And the side effects began to manifest that first week in November; low energy, getting every hour up to pee (all night long), having trouble maintaining 150 mL of liquid for the procedure w/o having to pee was an issue, to name a few, between the lack of sleep, side-effects of radiation and the prednisone, I wasn’t my usually cheery self. At the weekly check-in staff added a few meds to help.

We had dinner out, a great vegan Thai place, then went to a Kraken game and stayed at the Behnke House, Fred Hutch’s ‘hotel”, not too far from their campus, in the South Lake Union neighborhood.

Regarding transportation, our original plan to ride the bus was scrapped after one visit. We quickly realized that the journey required a passenger vehicle, as I had to drink lots of water and had to pee roughly every 15-20 minutes. I stashed a few small jugs in the car, just in case. They came in handy more than once.

We used the valet parking service at The Hutch. They are kind & quick, and it’s free for anyone receiving cancer treatment, and you’re not allowed to tip, they won’t take the money.

We had a playlist for the drive and started every trip with Cabezon by The Red House Painters. We’d go directly to the campus, takes about 20 minutes from the ferry.

A friend filled in as driver a couple of times. That was hugely kind of him, as I was not my best self. I yelled, from my friend’s car, at a pedestrian who was blocking traffic by not using the sidewalk, not my finest moment.

After giving your vehicle to the valets at Fred Hutch, you go to Oncology and check-in. They made a card for me to scan, so it was very easy. We’d talk with other cancer folks and their support, and drink water until the staff called me for the radiation session. We had the waiting room in a buzz of conversation, most days.

When they call you for your session, you go back to a changing room (they have half-a-dozen), strip down to your sox and t-shirt, don a gown, and wait to be called into Bert or Ernie, the two radiation rooms. My partner goes with me. I bought some unusual socks to wear each day, for the 28 sessions, e.g., sox with dogs on them, sushi sox, pink flamingos, you get the idea.

You get called into the radiation room, lay on the table, it’s covered with a sheet and the blue leg form they made during the first visit. The form holds your legs still. You split your gown, sit down on the table and swing your legs up, trying not to flash the techs. They cover your legs with a heated blanket covering up to your waist, They pull your gown up to reveal the tattoo markers on your stomach and each hip, squirt some heated jelly on your belly, and ultrasound you to check your water level. If you have enough liquid in your bladder, they line you up to do a 1-minute scan with the robotic, 4-arm, thingy that swings around the table’s axis. Then they do a final alignment and leave the room, closing a very thick door. You lay still, holding a foam donut, the robot begins to whine and click, then turns a complete revolution with all four arms, while 70s R&B plays in the background. You can sing along, but no toe-tapping. The robotic arms turn for one pass then reverses direction for a second trip, finally the arm stops, makes a few more clicks, then the really think door opens. You have to pee badly. The techs come in. You have to pee badly. They lower the table down. You have to pee badly. They put RoboZap (my name, not theirs) back a bit, and understand that you have to pee badly as you dart from the room, throwing thank yous over the shoulder, while you grasp your gown so as not to flash the crew (no one needs to see that) and dash for the bathroom.

And, in my case, you get to do that 28 times.

My partner would get the car as I dressed. On the way home we’d stop for soup at Met Market, where you need a daily-changing code for the bathroom that’s almost always occupied. The tomato mixed with ½ & ½ with the mushroom is quite good though. And once a week, if we had time, we’d go to Top Pot for a chocolate glazed or a Bavarian crème, because all the cake donuts were usually gone. Now remember, I have to pee about every 15 minutes for the next couple hours, due to the 40+ oz. of liquid I’ve had since 7 am, and the irritation caused to much of my nether region as a result of being regularly blasted with radiation.

My partner figured out insurance coverage, handled medical stuff, including the meds and supplements, and took care of the underappreciated, yeoman tasks. She is a brilliant advocate and has navigated all with skill and alacrity. I am lucky guy!

Then I got a rash on my back, so staff added a few more meds to help. By the time the Thanksgiving break arrived, I rattled for 30 minutes after taking my morning doses.

We are lucky enough to have lots of extended family in the area, so we enjoyed two Thanksgiving dinners. The gathering sizes are getting smaller, but it’s so nice to visit with everyone, for some, it’s the only time we see them. Needless to say, we really enjoyed both gatherings and we’ll have to figure out how to plan to gather more often.

Radiation was completed on Dec 5^th. We made orange-cinnamon soap for the techs, nurses and doctors who took such good care of us. They are an amazing group of professionals who put the patient first.

Now, the side-effects from radiation begin to wane, I’ve had a few nights recently where I had 3-4 hours of uninterrupted sleep.

We saw a physical therapist and worked with the pelvic floor muscles to speed my recovery, super helpful, immediate results from her knowledge. And I have some exercises to add to my routine.

We had lunch at The Athenian in the market. I went there a few times with my brother and sister-in-law when I first came to Seattle in 1985. It is still a great place, food is good, with quick and friendly service and the view is one of the best in Seattle!

My partner is helping a family member as I type. It’s been blowing like crazy here so the boys and I have yet to make it outside for a walk. But I see a shaft of sunlight peeking through and the trees have stopped their shaking and shedding of big branches. It’s time to get outside.

More to follow…

Onward...

 

Last week was busy! Doctor appointments, treatments adjusted, family arriving, Tennis and much to do in the garden as more veggies ripen. Plus, I bought a guitar online, that I did not like at first; comes with a gig bag versus a case, you have to install your own strap peg and the sapele wood body is nice, but it does not produce the warmer sound you get from mahogany. Nonetheless, it’s a very nice instrument, does the things I want it to do, the price was right, and, after playing it both unplugged and through the amp, I like the guitar.

As I mentioned in the last post, we had our first appointment with our medical oncologist at UW. He’ll be running the show. Because my insurance company requires pre-approval for the prescribed meds, it looked like we were going to have to come back another time to get the meds. Fortunately, Dr. Y prescribed Bicalutamide & Prednisone so we could start the hormone treatment.

We returned to UW on Friday for a shot of Lupron and a script for Abiraterone (replaces the Bicalutamide). And we had a DEXA bone scan later that day. Of course, any trip to Montlake wouldn’t be complete without a trip to Agua Verde Café & Paddle Club. Our friends owned the place years ago. That’s when we first discovered the Mangodilla (mango, cheese and chilis made quesadilla style) and kayaks and we were smitten! We continue to go for the great food, stellar location and its proximity to the UW facilities. And the fungus has been abated, thank God!!!!!

After meeting everyone on the care team and setting a strategy, I am sleeping better, I’m more relaxed and I’m less anxious about the future.

We’re still picking and processing in the garden; several gallons of black & blue berries have been frozen so far. They will taste good in smoothies all winter. We have more cukes to pickle. The plums are coming in. We’re splitting, pitting and dehydrating those. Apples are looking good. We have enough for a few jars of apple sauce, that is if they don’t get eaten first. They are tasty! And the melons are close to being ready too! And we are looking forward to corn, beans and squash soon.

The menus are getting dialed in. The halibut tacos last night were better than any in recent memory and a few nights before we created our own version of veggie enchiladas that will be featured regularly at the house.

Yesterday, we dusted off the golf clubs and played nine at Meadowmere. I was encouraged that I did not completely suck, averaged six strokes per hole (except when I didn’t), used the same ball for 9 holes, and found a few stragglers for the bag.

We continue to focus on the positive, host family & friends, walk the dogs, do yoga every night, lift weights daily, eat from a variety of tasty, nutritious food, and we’ve had a couple of fun rounds of disc golf at Battle Point. The anxiety is subsiding. And we are grateful for everyone and everything in our lives.

So it begins...

27 Aug 24

Made some great bread & butter refrigerator pickles from the cukes, peppers & garlic we grew. The blackberries are starting to ripen so we’re picking like crazy. Blueberries are almost finished. And we have a few strawberries and raspberries each day. We have one more apple pick, we'll make sauce with them. The melons are getting larger and looking gorgeous. We have watermelon, cantaloupe (Minnesota Midgets) & honeydews! The green beans have been amazing. Berit cooks them in a cast iron pan with lots of garlic and they're delicious! We spend a lot of time in our garden.

We met with our medical oncologist, Dr. Y, yesterday at UW Medicine. He’s nice, very informative and spent an hour going over options (there aren’t many choices), what to expect and to answer any questions we had. We really like Dr. Y. He’ll be directing the process for the foreseeable future. He’ll work with Dr. M, our radiologist at Fred Hutch. I should emphasize that all the people we’ve met during this process are smart, compassionate, and very generous with their time and knowledge. We feel cared for.

Following the protocol for advanced prostate cancer, we’re looking at two years of hormone therapy, with 5 weeks of daily radiation in the mix. That starts about 5 weeks from now. 

For the hormone treatment, one shot of Lupron every 3 months with a daily pill of Abiraterone (Zytiga). Because we didn’t want to delay the start of the healing process waiting for the insurance company to approve the treatment (the injection costs $5K), I’m taking Bicalutamide (Casodex) at this time to block production of testosterone, post-approval we will switch to Abiraterone (Zytiga).

And because abiraterone lowers the level of other hormones in the body, they add prednisone to the treatment to avoid additional side effects.

We’re using the nutritionist on staff, she’s wonderful, hoping to get access to acupuncture and maybe some counseling as this is pretty stressful stuff to digest. Fred Hutch and UW Medicine have lots of support services and we’re taking advantage of them 😊

I need to get a bone scan soon; to determine a baseline for bone strength as the hormone treatment can affect bone density. And we’ll continue to do regular bloodwork, throughout the process, to help monitor changes.

Side effects, there are a few, with possible fatigue, weight gain and hot flashes at the top of the list. Long term effects, will depend on how much radiation is used and how long the hormone treatment lasts.

And to add insult to injury, I have a fungal infection on my backside that is quite uncomfortable, but unlikely to have anything to do with the cancer. Regardless, I’m using an anti-fungal cream to treat and am watching my sugar/carb intake. It seems to be working.

The menus are getting easier to create as we dig deeper into a plant-based diet. We have a bunch of recipes now which are tasty and nutritious. We made some yummy enchilada’s last night.

I have a daily weight routine. I no longer run so we walk a lot with the dogs (cycling is out until the fungus is eradicated). We do yoga every evening. I’m 180 lbs, same weight as my junior year in high school. I have no stress to speak of (except cancer) and I feel great!

We’re hearing from lots of friends and family who are keeping us in their hearts and minds. Thank you, it means a lot.

Fingers crossed 😊

The First Week of August '24

“The first week of August hangs at the very top of the summer, the top of the live-long year, like the highest seat of a Ferris wheel when it pauses in its turning. The weeks that come before are only a climb from balmy spring, and those that follow a drop to the chill of autumn, but the first week of August is motionless, and hot. It is curiously silent, too, with blank white dawns and glaring noons, and sunsets smeared with too much color. Often at night there is lightning, but it quivers all alone. There is no thunder, no relieving rain. These are strange and breathless days, the dog days, when people are led to do things they are sure to be sorry for after.” -  Tuck Everlasting by Natalie Babbitt 

Granted we’re just about to finish the second week in August, but I love this quote and figured we were still close enough to use it.

 

We are still hanging with the dogs. We’re down to two at this time, Vinnie & Freddy. We refer to them as “The Boys”. The third, Mac, had some challenges and he’s moved in with some folks who are better positioned to help him.

 

We’ve had a great spring and summer, lots of projects completed. The garden keeps us busy. It’s very green right now with everything moving quickly toward harvest. We’ve been picking berries for several weeks now, started with the strawberries, then the raspberries came in, now we’re picking blueberries as well. We get 3-4 lbs each time we pick and yet we don’t seem to make a dent in the patch. We’re eating a lot, giving some away and the rest are going in the freezer for smoothies and pies. Potatoes and cukes are starting to show up. We’ll start making bread & butter pickles soon. And we already processed some apples into apple sauce, one of my faves.

 

We’ve been fortunate to have some visitors lately. My sister and one of her college friends came in May for a week. We did lots of touristy things, Port Townsend, Pike Place Market, Winslow Way, to name a few spots explored. We made great diners every night and crashed early to be ready for the next day’s adventure.

Our sister-in-law travelled from New Zealand to visit in July. She was in the area for a high school reunion. We were so happy to have her here for a few weeks. The weather was sunny and warm for her visit. We picked berries, took The Boys on lots of walks, did some touristy things and made so many great dinners that we started a list (menu?) to keep track.

My older brother will here in 10 days. He’s travelled from New Zealand as well and is in Maine, hanging with our other siblings and their families. We’re the only two in our family who don’t live in the Northeast.

 

After 42 years of gainful employment, in two very different, but very satisfying careers, I retired on the morning of July 1^st. That afternoon I went to UW Medicine to get a PET/CT scan to determine the length and breadth of my prostate cancer, great people and facility. Prior to the screen, they inject you with a liquid that marks the cancer. It has to be inside you for a bit before they start the scan, so we walked up to the Suzzalo Library Reading Room, amazing spot! The scan was 20 minutes. We hopped the light rail back downtown and stopped at Wild Ginger on the way back to the ferry.

We got a link to the scan results Wednesday evening, the night before July 4^th. We have no medical experience but could tell that it probably wasn’t good. Our suspicions were confirmed on Friday when we visited our urologist. The cancer had escaped my prostate and gone walkabout. It was in my nodes and possibly a couple other places. The procedure scheduled to take place that morning (a tour of my urethra via ‘microscope’) was canceled. It was hard to get any information from our urologist beyond that we needed to go to Seattle to take care of this and that we should make appointments with a radiologist and a urologic oncologist. We left with no referrals for facilities or doctors. It was disappointing, to say the least.

Upon arrival at home, we started googling and dialing. By 2 PM we had appointments with a radiologist at Fred Hutch and a urologic oncologist at UW Medicine. I’d just like to say that the folks at Fred Hutch and UW Medicine are knowledgeable, compassionate and very nice humans. I feel that we are in good hands.

We have since completed the appointments and have the beginnings of a strategy. After meeting with the urologic oncologist at UW Medicine we know that surgery is not an option. We meet with a medical oncologist at the end of the month to schedule hormone therapy to stop my production of testosterone (it feeds the cancer) which will be followed by 5 weeks of radiation.

The timing of this is fortunate in that I am retired, and it takes some time to navigate the Byzantine labyrinth we call healthcare. The unfortunate part, my condition was revealed at the start of summer and many of the medical staff, doctors especially, are taking their well-deserved summer vacations.

I should add that I have the best partner in the world; smart & resourceful, focused & disciplined, caring & compassionate, and, as luck would have it, an absolutely awesome human! She is motivated and tireless in her support, I definitely hit ‘The Lotto’ when we met!

 

It may sound bleak to many of you, but we do not feel that way. Yes, it’s been difficult, can’t remember dealing with this much stress, ever. I wake in tears most mornings, but it’s more of a pressure release than sadness for my condition or remorse for not acting sooner to address the cancer. We have faith and welcome the work ahead. We are active with healthy lifestyles and with a few tweaks, we’ll dial it in to create the best support system possible. We’re doing lots of yoga, have moved to a vegetarian diet (mostly), maybe vegan soon, lots of walks with The Boys and whatever else we need. Also, we’ve discovered some great resources for; reducing stress, staying active, making meals and lots more ideas for building our support system.

Please keep us in your thoughts and send some positive energy our way, we can use it. We’re planning on many years to come, but right now, we just need a little bit of luck.

 

More to follow…